By Jacob

In this column I will talk about things that come to mind. You may agree or disagree, find it funny or sad. Whatever. My column, my thoughts. Feel free to post yours at the end.

Broken Mega-Event Promises

Wow, it certainly has been a while since we last saw each other, hasn’t it? You look well. Have you dropped a few pounds? How’s the family? Good, good.

Now that the pleasantries are out of the way, let’s get back to what I’ve been slacking on for so long – the world of mutantdom (not a word). When last we met, I was complaining about the missed opportunities with House of M and going cautiously towards Civil War. Turns out my points were well-founded, but I’m not here to pat myself on the back about previous entries. Instead, I want to expand on the aftermath of House of M that was M-Day now that we’ve (finally) gotten past a story where characters actually seem to be concerned about it.

To say that anything that happens in comics will be permanent is unrealistic. To believe that anything that happens in comics will be permanent is naïve. So when several (not really) major characters lost their powers following House of M, I was doubtful about the permanence of the whole deal. Sure, you may drop the mutant population back down to where they are the ‘hated minority’ again – but 200 left? No new mutant children characters? I didn’t buy it. I was even less convinced that the (not really) major players would stay de-powered, and I wasn’t disappointed. Iceman didn’t really lose his powers, Polaris got substitute powers, Professor X got chucked into the M’Krann Crystal, Magneto may or may not have gotten his back by the unnecessary return of the Xorn debacle. Even Feral and Thornn got their “appearances without their powers” back (the less I rant about that story the better) and New Warriors has re-powered through artificial means a good chunk of second-stringers (Beak, Angel Salvatore, Chamber, Jubilee, Wind Dancer, Radian, Stacy X, Redneck, Tattoo).

Now, opposite to what it may sound like, I don’t have a problem with these characters being re-powered. There’s a reason characters in comics have powers and there’s not a lot that you can do with them without. What I tire of is the constant promises of “this will change everything FOREVER!” No it won’t. Eventually someone will come up with a story that will undo something in the past, and that’s fine. I don’t care if a character comes back from the dead or someone, let’s say, is revealed to be a Skrull, as long as it makes a good story and sticks with what has already taken place. Look what Ed Brubaker did with Bucky/Winter Soldier. But when something major takes place that might warrant a redo down the line, don’t swear to it that such action will never take place. Longtime comic fans are a cynical bunch, and we became such by believing such promises when we were fresh-faced kids slapping down our hard-earned dollars for an issue of Chris Claremont’s Uncanny X-Men. Yes, kids, there was a time when comics cost a single dollar.

The point I’m trying laboriously to make is that it’s great to hype a major storyline. Can’t miss? Okay, you’ve got my attention. Change the status quo? Wow, I’m pretty interested. Things will NEVER be the same! Wait, hold on for a second. You’re not getting me with that one. Spider-Man is being written in somewhat of a 60s style again. All you’re doing by promising what you’ve got to know cannot be upheld, you’re just giving fuel to the fire of fan ire on message boards (Mutatis Mutandis message boards notwithstanding, of course). It doesn’t matter how long it takes to undo something previously promised as undoable (surprisingly, actually a word) someone will remember it and that someone will start the flooding of complaints.

So forget about us on this one – we obviously will buy it anyway. Just think of yourselves before you make promises that will eventually be broken. Trust me – one of us will be watching, and it’s probably just not worth the headache.